


Thorns

by Hamliet



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bring a Toothbrush for real, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Minor Poe Dameron/Finn, Romance, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-07-15 15:30:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7228270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hamliet/pseuds/Hamliet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren walks into Rey's new florist shop, determined to insult someone via flowers. The price is higher than he bargained for. Unabashedly fluffy. One-shot. Rated M for language.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thorns

**Author's Note:**

> This prompt was given to me from lonewizzy, taken from a tumblr prompt by demisexualmerrill.

**Enchantment**

"Are roses allowed?" Rey asks Finn. The scent of lilies and gardenias hangs in the air. Sun filters in through two long windows at the front of the store.

"Roses are cliché for a wedding, Rey," Finn responds, leaning back against the counter. His phone lights up. "Dammit."

"Poe overruled you, didn't he?"

"No." Finn tries to cover his screen, but Rey wrestles it away from him.

_Roses pls?_

"I win," Rey says triumphantly.

"You're not the one getting married!" Finn protests, jarring a small potted cactus. "Oh shit!" He leaps up to catch it before it shatters to the ground.

The door slams, the little bell Rey carefully attached clanging frantically. Boots clap against the tiled floor as a tall man, hair black and long and loose and wavy, marches towards her.

"Can I help you?" Rey asks cheerfully.

He tosses his wallet onto the counter. "How do I passive aggressively say 'fuck you' in flower?"

"Excuse me?" Rey blinks.

"Not _you_ , you. Someone else. If I had to send them flowers and I hated them, what could I do?"

Rey stares at him, agape. _What the hell?_ She's never heard of such a bizarre question in the past two years she and Finn have owned D'Qar Floristry.

"Have you considered just giving them the middle finger?" Finn asks.

The man fixes Finn with such a glare that Rey's inside turn.

"I'll be outside, Rey," Finn squeaks.

 _What?_ "Hey!" But he's gone, and she turns back to face the dark haired man. She might have to use this bouquet of flowers herself on Finn when he gets back. _How you like these flowers for your wedding_? "Dead flowers? We have some."

"No, living ones, like with meaning to them. Aren't flowers symbolic? Red roses for true love, white roses for innocence and all that?"

Rey blinks, surprised by his knowledge. Most customers don't know or care about what an orange lily means. "Why are you giving them flowers if you hate them?"

"Because it's my parents' anniversary, and I don't get along with them."

"What?" Rey's jaw drops and rage surges hot within her. "You're a terrible son!"

"They were terrible parents, and what's it to you if I'm paying you? I could always go to Jakku—"

"No," Rey cuts him off, shuddering inside as she remembers that awful store she worked at for years. She hates that place and its slimeball owner. "What kind of flowers does your mother like?"

"I have no idea," he says. She narrows her eyes, and his face flushes. "Are you judging me?"

"Yes." Rey heads through the aisles, the man following her. "Some people aren't lucky enough to have parents, and you want to give your mother an ugly bouquet like a bratty teenager."

"I didn't say an ugly bouquet. I wanted a passive-aggressive way of saying 'fuck you.'"

Rey selects a trio of orange lilies. A bee buzzes close to her face and the man slaps at it. "Knock it off!"

"What? It could sting—"

"It won't unless you piss it off," Rey exclaims.

His eyes widen.

She turns back to the aisles, searching.

"Do you not have parents?" he ventures.

Rey shudders. "None of your business."

"I'm sorry," he says quietly.

"I don't want your pity." Rey hesitates and adds a few extra flowers. She's going to make the biggest bouquet she's ever made, save for funeral flowers. _Two can play this passive-aggressive game._

The man paces back and forth, pausing to read a chart she's hung up on the wall, detailing seven different colors of roses and their meanings. "Roses can be purple?"

"Look over there," Rey directs, pointing to several. "Means enchantment."

He nods. "Interesting."

"You don't have to be pretend-polite," Rey says as Finn scuttles back in. He darts past Rey. She grins as she finishes the bouquet, admiring the bright orange and violet colors. "Here's your bouquet of spite. Looks pretty at least."

"It does," he agrees, his lips twitching as if maybe he's experiencing a smidgeon of regret. Rey hopes so.

"Ninety bucks?" he yelps.

"It is a rather large bouquet of hate. And also, my first hate arrangement ever. Consider yourself lucky; maybe next time I'll add an additional charge."

He scowls but signs his name. _Kylo Ren_.

* * *

**Captivation**

Two months pass, and Rey forgets about Kylo Ren and his bizarre request. Poe and Finn continue to plan their wedding, which sometimes includes Poe stopping by in the middle of the day with his dog, Beebee-Ate, and narrowly managing to restrain the animal from destroying everything in the shop. Not that Rey minds. She loves Beebee-Ate.

"Uh, sorry about that," Poe says as Beebee-Ate knocks over two pots of chrysanthemums.

"It's fine. You didn't mean it, girl, did you?" Rey coos to the dog, kneeling to clean the dirt up. Finn grabs a broom.

"Hey," says a voice from above her.

"I'll be right—" _That_ voice. Rey swivels her head around to look up at Kylo Ren, who stares at her with amused eyes.

"Haven't seen you in awhile, Ben," states Poe.

He grips his wrist and glances around. Finn returns. "Hate bouquet man!"

"That's your supervillain name, apparently," Rey informs him, jumping to her feet to let Finn sweep up the dirt. She puts the last of the large pottery shards on a nearby table. "Wait, did he call you Ben? Isn't it Kylo Ren?"

"You remember my name?" He runs his hand through his hair. God, if she could have hair like that.

"Your request _was_ pretty unique," she points out. "Do you need another hate bouquet?"

"The hell is that?" asks Poe.

"Nothing," Kylo says at the same time as Rey answers: "He gave his parents a hate bouquet."

"You've _got_ to be kidding me!" Poe explodes. Even Beebee-Ate cowers. "You're _that_ man? You're—I work for his mom, Rey! Do you have any idea how happy she is that she even freaking heard from you? She kept those flowers until they rotted! And all this while you were _insulting_ her?"

Kylo's face pales. He glances at Rey, his lips trembling. "I—"

"You are an asshole," Finn states, leaning against the broom. "Leia Organa is the nicest—"

"Forget it!" He takes off, stalking towards the door. Rey hears him yell in frustration.

"Rey, don't—" Finn starts, but she's already heading for the door.

"Are you okay?" she hollers as he doubles over beside his car. Black, of course. Like his outfit.

"Go away!" He slams his fist into his side.

"Fucking stop!" Rey lunges and catches his wrist. He stares at her, tears in his eyes, lips parted in shock that she actually tried to stop him. "You're too upset to drive," she says. "Do you have someone you can call?"

"Do I have—" He laughs, a brutal and broken sounds. Cars stream by on the highway. "No. I don't."

"What'd you come here for?" she asks.

"Another 'fuck you' bouquet," he mumbles, not meeting her eyes.

Rey shakes her head.

"But for a coworker this time. My boss is promoting him and wants flowers for the decoration."

"You are a piece of work," she informs him.

"And you think you know everything. You don't. Your friend there might work for Leia but he has no idea about her as a mother. And if you worked for Snoke University—"

"Snoke University?" she repeats, the sun shining down on her back. That seals it. "Come inside. We'll make your bouquet. Or, Finn will make your bouquet."

"Huh?" He blinks.

"Finn took a few classes there and hated a certain Professor Phasma."

"Well, the colleague it's for is Professor Hux, but Phasma _is_ one of Hux's friends," Kylo says.

Rey shouldn't be feeling this much glee, but she is. "Perfect."

Poe stands back with a scowl when they reenter, but Finn agrees to help after she namedrops Hux and Snoke University.

"Hux is allergic to lilies, though," Kylo adds. "Can we do orange roses instead?"

"No. Those mean captivation. Not good enough for a hate bouquet," Finn informs him.

This time, Kylo gives her a twenty-dollar tip. Her jaw drops as he rushes out the door.

"What exactly is going on between him and his parents?" she asks Poe.

"That's the million dollar question."

* * *

**Appreciation and Gratitude**

It's two weeks before Kylo Ren steps in again. This time, Finn and Poe are out cake-tasting. Two months left until their big day. Rey smiles. They've been teasing her constantly about her lack of a date.

"Rey?"

She jumps. "Hate bouquet for whom this time?"

"No hate bouquet. Just some lilies."

"To torment Professor Hux? How did he like his flowers, by the way?"

"As much as Hux ever likes something—with a nod and a roll of his eyes." Kylo rolls _his_ eyes. "But no. I need them for other things. For my grandparents."

"Oh. Okay." Rey hopes out from behind the counter.

"I also wanted to thank you," he adds. "For helping me. You were right—I kind of lost control, and I—I'm getting help now, and—I wanted to thank you."

"Oh." A strange sensation prickles down Rey's neck. "Thanks."

"I'm also looking for a new job."

"Cool beans." Rey holds up white lilies. "Will these do?"

"They're perfect," he says quickly, his eyes looking through the stems and into hers. The florist shop is warm and humid, but Rey suddenly feels a bead of sweat at her temples.

"Have you contacted your mother?" she inquires as she rings him up.

"No." He glances at the counter, at the dirt stains Rey forgot to clean up, and doesn't look repulsed or annoyed. "It's complicated."

"I'm sure." She's not being sarcastic.

"My father wanted me to work with my uncle directly out of college," Kylo tells her. "I didn't want to. My uncle's kind of well-known—"

"Everyone's heard of Luke Skywalker," Rey says, naming the psychologist well-known for his ground-breaking research. "Can you get me his autograph?"

"Nope." Kylo laughs, at least. "But I didn't want to, and there were some fights, and yeah. My dad's stubborn."

"The apple," Rey says. "Doesn't fall far from the tree." Although she hopes her apple has run screaming away from her parents' tree.

"How about you?" Kylo asks.

"My parents abandoned me in foster care when I was five. Wanted to see the world, didn't need a kid. They said they'd come back. They didn't." Rey snorts.

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, you've said that before." She rolls her eyes. "Finn was my foster brother. We've been together since I was fifteen."

"Are you thinking about getting married soon?" he teases, but there's a hitch in his voice.

"Not like that!" Rey gasps. "I mean, Finn is getting married. In two months. To Poe."

"Oh." Kylo shakes his head, letting out a little laugh. "Small world."

"Yeah." She bites her lip, her heart pounding. "You know… if my parents were around, I'd try to reach them. If I could. With a hate bouquet, unless they wanted me. Then I'd try to make amends."

Kylo sighs and steps back from the counter. "You can't make people love you the way you want them to."

Rey bites her lip.

"I'll also take one of those dark pink roses," he adds.

"What?"

"They mean gratitude, don't they?" he asks as she rings him up. He pays, and then he hands it over to her. "Thank you."

"For badgering you?" she jokes.

"For caring."

* * *

**Friendship**

"I killed one of the lily plants," Kylo tells her with a cringe when he shows up at the end of summer. "Do you have another?"

"You might just want to wait for next year," Rey tells him.

"No." Kylo shakes his head and hesitates. "I keep lilies on my grandparents' graves until Labor Day. It just hasn't been raining, and—"

"You do that?" Rey frowns.

He shrugs. "I may hardly ever talk to my real parents, but that doesn't mean—"

"I think that's sweet," Rey says quickly. Oh, good grief. Why did she say that? She could peel her face off from embarrassment.

He shrugs.

"Have you found a new job yet?"

Kylo groans. "No. I need to find one soon, though, or I have to go back to work when school starts next month."

"Why don't you ask your parents for help? I'm sure they have connections."

"Not a chance in hell," Kylo responds, hunching his shoulders.

"What's a bigger failure to you?" Rey asks. "Asking them for help, or having to work at a job you hate?"

"I don't want to talk about that," he snaps.

"Okay." Rey raises her hands. "Sorry."

"I did talk to my mother the other day," Kylo admits. "She's all excited about Poe's wedding. She wishes he was her son, probably."

"In his defense, he's never sent her a hate bouquet." Rey sighs. "I'm doing flowers for Finn and Poe's wedding, _and_ I'm their bridesmaid. I'll refrain from informing your mother about the hate flowers."

"Sounds like a plan." He smiles.

A crazy idea inserts itself into her brain _. Don't do it. Don't do it, Rey._

_Oh hell._

"Hey," she says as he starts to leave with his lily plant. "I don't have a date to the wedding. I mean, you'd have to see your mom, but—I—" _What are you doing, Rey? You're an idiot! An idiot!_

"You're too insecure to go by yourself?" he taunts.

"I'm about to make you a fuck you bouquet," Rey says, trying to laugh when really she feels like her insides are melting.

"Okay," he says. "So long as I don't have to talk to my mother for very long."

Rey's jaw drops. _He said_ yes?

* * *

The day of the wedding, Rey wears a purple dress, her hair worn loose and wavy. She clutches a bouquet of yellow roses as she waits with Finn, both of them laughing.

Poe and Finn exchange vows in a verdant garden blooming with flowers. Ivy and roses adorn the guests' chairs, and tears swim in Rey's eyes as she watches the man she thinks of as her brother marry her friend.

When the ceremony ends, Rey finds Kylo and grins as him. "Thanks for coming."

"You look beautiful," he tells her, face red. Still, he reaches out and tugs at a strand of her hair. "I like your hair like this."

"Thanks."

"Ben!"

He cringes.

Leia Organa rushes over to them. "I didn't know you were coming!"

"He's my date. Well, we're friends, but he came as my date," Rey clarifies. Kylo narrows his eyes.

"It's really good to see you," she tells him, and guilt pinches Rey's stomach as she remembers the hate bouquet.

"Hey, kid," says a gruff voice.

Kylo gulps. His fists clench and Rey forces a too-sunny smile on her face.

"Hi, Dad," Kylo says. "Rey, this is my father, Han Solo. This is Rey. We're just friends," he adds, his tone rising and falling in the same inclinations as Rey's excuse earlier. Her cheeks burn.

_We are, though, aren't we?_

_We're actually friends._ She glances at her bouquet of yellow roses and smiles.

"Nice to meet you, Rey," Han says. "You're Finn's sister, right?"

"Yes, except for legally," Rey answers, but Han gives her a kind smile and nod as if to reassure her that he knows and he's sorry.

Before the past few months, the only people who ever said they were sorry for Rey were Finn and Poe. Her old boss and foster father, Unkar Plutt, used to scream at her and Finn that it was their fault their parents didn't want them, that they were wastes of space and air and incapable of learning the simplest things, like how to run a shop. So Rey showed him. She started her own shop at age nineteen.

 _Maybe people are kinder than I thought,_ Rey thinks.

"How's work going?" Han asks, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he looks up at his son.

Kylo glances at the buffet of food, the enormous wedding cake deceptively covered in white frosting. Rey knows there's chocolate underneath. "It's fine. Preparing for the new year."

 _Oh, for heaven's sake._ Rey scowls at him.

"Right." Han sighs. "Come over more. We miss you, kid."

"I'll try."

"Only if his boss gives him permission, right?" says a very tall, very hairy man who comes up beside Han, slapping him on the shoulder. "Heard you're Snoke's bitch boy, Ben."

"Chewie, cut it out," Leia says with a groan.

"Talk to you later," Kylo says formally, taking Rey's arm and leading her away. His eyes crinkle in humiliation, as if he's trying desperately not to squeeze them shut and vanish.

"Sorry about that," Rey mutters.

"Don't be." Kylo shrugs.

"Why not? Can't I feel sorry for you?"

"It makes me uncomfortable."

"Well, I know you're filled with a lot of self-pity, but I don't think it's quite the same thing," Rey retorts.

His jaw drops, and he runs his hand through his hair. "Rey—"

"Yeah?"

He shakes his head. "Want to eat?"

"I _always_ want to eat," she answers. Kylo watches in amazement as she loads up her plate with colorful salad, lasagna, bread, and grilled chicken garnished in cilantro. And she eats every last cherry tomato.

"Do you eat at home?" he jokes.

"I try," she says as Snap Wexley dings his glass, and everyone turns to watch Finn and Poe kiss. "But actually. When I was like five, my foster mother wouldn't always feed me. I stayed with her for two years. It's kind of hard to break that habit."

He nods.

"Why do you go by Kylo Ren, and not Ben?" Rey asks as she gulps some of her water. She glances towards the bar. She could use a white Russian right about now.

"I changed it. My father's pretty well known. So is my mother. I just—wanted to blaze my own trail." He shakes his head. "You can tell how _that_ turned out."

"Abysmally?"

He snorts. "Do you want to dance?"

Rey cocks her head, her hair brushing her shoulders. "If you buy me a drink afterwards."

Music crooning about love, Kylo holds her by the waist and they sway together on the dance floor. His hands are huge. Everything about him is huge. And he's looking at Rey like she's a queen, like she's something special and unique. The same way Finn looks at Poe, and Poe looks at Finn.

 _What is happening here_? Rey wonders, fear climbing up her spine. He holds out his hand and spins her around, a playful grin on his lips. Her skirt flares, and she loves it and wants to hide under a desk, a child curled up in a fetal position, waiting for the screaming to stop. Because no one's ever thought she's special. Not in _this_ way.

 _I don't know if I can do this._ It's all she's ever wanted, and he's nothing she's ever wanted, and suddenly they're combined and she's afraid.

"How about that drink now?" she manages when the music stops. Kylo nods and steps away.

"Hey, Rey," says a deep voice behind her. _Chewie_.

"Um, hi."

"Sorry if what I said came across as, you know, mean earlier," Chewie says. "But Han really misses his son."

Rey nods.

"If you could, I don't know, encourage him to visit at all, he'd really appreciate it. We all would. Gifts aren't quite enough." Chewie laughs.

Rey nods with a smile on her face, but inside she's screaming. _I can't fix your family. I couldn't fix mine. I can't even fix my bloody self._

* * *

**Admiration and Sympathy**

Rey rushes home to her minuscule apartment after the wedding. Finn and Poe leave for their honeymoon, and she cries in Beebee-Ate's fur.

The dog comes to work with her for the next week, tied on a leash to keep her from eating all the plants. "Sorry, girl," Rey says. The shop's quiet, and Rey leans her head back, soaking in the sun and the sweet, sweet scent.

"Hey," says a familiar voice.

 _So much for peace_.

"Ben?" she asks, arching an eyebrow.

"So now it's Ben?"

"What do you prefer?"

He shrugs. God, he's smirking and his lips—they're too large. God's against her. It's unfair. "Snoke is the one who suggested I change it."

"Really?" Rey's suspicions flare and _dammit_ , she can't kick him out. "That old hag. Why?"

"Same reasons I told you. My family name comes with expectations."

"Poor little rich boy," Rey mocks as she grabs a watering can.

"Do you need help?"

"If you're volunteering to work for the day, it has to be for free. We're successful, but I can't pay you," Rey tells him. Beebee-Ate whines.

_You too? Stupid dog._

Kylo reaches for the watering can. "I don't mind. Hell, I can even give you another of those pink roses for gratitude." He nods.

Rey follows his gaze. "Wrong shade of pink. Light pink is for admiration or sympathy."

"Really?" He shakes his head.

"If you drown any of my plants, you drown next," Rey calls as she fills another watering can.

Kylo freezes. "So… how much water do I give them?"

"Depends on the plant." Rey catches up to him and stares in horror at her swimming cacti. "You need a teacher."

"I need a teacher," he concurs.

She's not going to make this easy for him. Rey quickly dumps some of the water out of the cacti's pots. "So… Snoke. What made you want to work for him?"

"I wasn't a fan of my uncle's research, and it was essentially him or Snoke. They're both psychologists, you know. And my uncle's research made me uncomfortable, so I chose Snoke."

"Really? That's all?" Rey squeezes the dirt with her thumbs. Excess water oozes out. Sweat dribbles down her back.

"I'd done some internships for Snoke over the years… starting in high school." Kylo shrugs. "He always seemed to care about me, about what I wanted, more than my parents did. I mean, they loved me… but they carried expectations with it. If I didn't maintain a certain GPA—if I didn't get into a specific school—you were always elft wondering whether that love would be pulled, you know?"

"I don't. I never had so much as a foster parent who even claimed to love me." She snorts. "I always wondered if something was wrong with me. Something broken that meant I couldn't be loved, and it was unfixable. Then Finn came along." She wipes at a loose strand of hair. Kylo catches her wrist before she smears dirt all over her face. "Oops."

He tucks her oily strand behind her ear.

_Crap, why didn't I shower this morning?_

"There's nothing wrong with you," he tells her.

Wishful thinking. There's something wrong with her, there's something wrong with him, something broken that neither of them can erase. They can't. It's done. No point in trying.

Is there? Is it? Can they?

"I love my parents, but I'm so mad at them," Kylo tells her. "I don't know how to go to them and ask—and—"

"Do you want to, though?" Rey swallows. She remembers Chewie's request, unfair though it was.

 _No_. She's not going to manipulate Kylo. Or Ben. Whomever he is. He can make his own decisions.

"I don't know. There are things that—that I don't want to tell them."

"Like what?" she inquires.

He looks at her like a wounded child who ran off from his parents in a theme park and can't find his way back even though he so, so wants to. She reaches for his hand with her dirt-smeared one and holds it, his callouses and hers scraping against each other.

 _You don't have to tell me,_ she thinks, and it's as if he's reading her thoughts in every stroke of her thumb. _Whenever you want to, I'll listen._

His phone rings, and Kylo pulls away, answering it with a scowl. "What, Hux?"

Rey can't decipher the words, but she picks up on the cold tone all the same. Kylo's eyes widen, redden. His lips flap as if unable to take in air.

"Ben?" she squeaks.

"My father's—had a heart attack. Mom called the school—Hux told her that I quit this morning—I've got to—"

"Take these," Rey tells him, grabbing several of the soft pink roses. "Then you can tell him you're sorry, you sympathize, and you admire him."

* * *

**Innocence and Remembrance**

Rey sends white roses to the funeral home. For free. She does all the flowers for free. Finn will kill her for the terrible business decision, but Rey doesn't much care.

"Did you get to see him at least?" she asked over the phone. "Before—"

"No," Kylo told her, voice shattered.

She closes her shop that Saturday, takes the bus to the Corellia Church. In the parking lot, Chewie calls out to her.

"Rey!"

"Chewie." She glances at the burly man, his rounds face streaked with tears. "I'm so sorry for your loss." She's never lost someone close to her. Never, except for now. And her parents. But they chose to go. Han didn't. She barely knew him, but she knows Kylo, and it hurts.

"Thanks, kid." Chewie wraps an arm around her.

"I'm sorry—I know Ky-Ben didn't get to—"

"Rey, he tried," Chewie interrupts. "He went to the hospital. I was there. He held his mother. He _cared_. Thank you for that."

"Thank him, not me," Rey says. "He did that all on his own."

_Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me._

The hymn floats through the parking lot. Rey doesn't know what she'll say to Kylo. She can't relate. She has nothing. Her parents really fucked her over on this one.

_I once was lost, but now am found, was blind, but now I see._

After the service, she doesn't say anything. She just takes his hand.

* * *

**Love and Courage**

She doesn't hear much from Kylo over the next few weeks. A text here and there. She tries not to let it get to her, but it's a thorn embedded in her skin, infected and inflamed.

"Leia's doing okay," Poe tells her. "About as well as can be expected."

Rey knows she should give them some space, but she doesn't know what to do. She should feel relieved. She was scared, after all. But she doesn't. She just wants to know.

It's late on a Wednesday in September when she closes the shop. The leaves have just started to change, tinges of orange and scarlet and gold creeping into the green. Rey slips on a gray sweater as she locks the door behind her.

"Hey!" he calls out.

"Kylo?" Her jaw drops as she jogs towards him. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," he tells her, but he's not. Regret cuts through his tone.

"Are you sure?"

"No," he admits. "But I—I've been trying to spend more time with my mother."

"I'm glad," Rey tells him, her breath hitching. Because she is glad.

"Begging forgiveness and all," he adds with a wry smile.

If her parents were to return and beg her forgiveness, what would she do? "Did she—"

"She knew I quit from the day she called Hux at the university," Kylo tells her. "She wanted to know why I hadn't told her earlier."

"What did you say?"

"The truth." He shrugs. "There are still lots of things I haven't told her—don't know if I can—"

"Criminal things?" Rey asks cautiously. The sun dips below the treeline and she shivers.

"No." He laughs. "Just—things I'm ashamed of."

"I'm happy for you," she tells him.

"Thanks. I got a new job, too—in a city a ways from here. Working for my uncle." He wrinkles his nose.

"So… you're moving away."

He nods.

 _Dammit, why?_ Rey looks up at the moon, white in a silver-indigo sky, and wants to scream.

"It's only three hours. Bus tickets are cheap," Kylo tells her. "And I can visit."

Rey sniffs. "If you want to."

"I do," he tells her, stepping closer. "Rey—"

"What is this?" Rey blurts out. "What are we doing? Where are we going? I can't tell if you feel something for me or if it's just in my love-starved imagination. I have no idea. I don't even know how much I feel for you, if I do at all. I don't know what to do or say."

"I like you, Rey," he cuts in. "I do." His eyes are shining and Rey shakes her head.

"Thanks?"

He snorts.

"I don't know how, though."

"How what?" Cars blare their horns on the nearby highway.

Rey jumps. "To be—like are you asking me out?"

He nods. "Dinner? Tonight?"

She laughs. "Yeah, but I've never—I've never had a date, Kylo."

"Don't be afraid," he tells her. "I—"

"Well, I am afraid. Because I really acre about you, and you're leaving. Gee, that's familiar." Rey knows she's ranting and raving but dear God, she's tired of trying to keep her head above the water, pretend she's better, she's healed, when she's still bleeding out. _How could you love this?_ _I am a mess_. "God, I'm sorry."

"Rey, I'm a total fuck-up," Kylo tells her. "You know that better than anyone. But I like you, and I think you're smart and funny and cute, and I just—if you want to try, I'd want to try." His lips curve. "You need a teacher." He frowns. "Not that I have much experience either."

Rey laughs. "We can be two newbies making a mess of things."

"Why not?" Kylo agrees.

"All I know is to speak flower. I may have to send you them when you're working away in whatever town it is you're going to."

"Ahch-To. And if you prefer to speak flower—" He clears his throat and takes his arm out from behind his back. "Will these do?"

Red roses. Rey reaches for them.

"I did have to go to Jakku for them," Kylo admits. "You never leave your shop, so I—"

"Hey! They're my competition!" Rey whacks him on the shoulder with the roses.

"At least they're not a hate bouquet!" he protests, hands up.

"'Fuck you' in flower," Rey remembers, grinning. Kylo reaches for her, putting his hand on her shoulders. She tilts her head up. He's so close, like the time they were dancing.

He leans down and brushes his lips against hers.

"That's all?" she asks.

"What do you want?" he returns, a soft smile on his lips.

She pulls his neck down and kisses him, even though she has no clue what she's doing. His lips open to receive hers, and she wonders if they look ridiculous and decides she doesn't care. His hands roam through her loose hair and hers dig through his.

 _I don't know if I like you, Kylo Ren, Ben Solo,_ Rey thinks. _Maybe I love you. We'll see._

"Oh, fuck," Kylo gasps as they finally pull apart.

Rey smirks. His thumb traces her cheekbone.

"How do you say 'fuck me' but not in flower?" he asks. "Sorry if that's too crude—"

"Please." Rey stops him, standing up to kiss him again. His breath grows hot against her cheek as she trails her lips down his neck. "I'll show you."


End file.
